Ghost stories, again.

Your life force is depleting and yet all you can think about is to leave again.

I miss my little brother.
So hard to reach him these days even though he’s only about a 30 minutes drive away.
Don’t think I ask him enough
How he’s been.

My little sister is a mother and married now.
I know they’ll do great for little Omni.

My mother would always call me during my birthday.
She hasn’t as of late.
After the passing of her sister and mother.
When she says in her sighing ways that she’s fine
I know she’s not okay.

I want to celebrate life so much
But lately I’ve been pouring my drinks down the drain
Dodging my friends
Only calling them when I’m in need of some good distraction.

You allow me into your life for a night again
After not responding to my messages
I came on the grounds of your paradise
And suddenly the loud year spent away becomes
No louder than the humming of your resting playstation.

I keep waiting by the door
For you guys
To come say hi again
But you don’t
Think it’s time I shut off my phone
Turn off my email notifications
I’m gone again.

//

One year closer to the age I joke about never making it to.

29 times around the sun. That’s roughly a bit over 390 times the moon has revolved around me.
And in that time, I’ve seen a few stars dim out.

One, a glimmer of an old smile fading.

Opened a portal,
Jumped into it
I’ll be back again.

Injected what I thought were moments of love
Into my bloodstream
Came back to y’all trying to find the antidote in my veins
The more I claw at it
The more vomit I project

Shed the old husk
I am now the ghost in your stories
If fate is kind
Maybe we’ll cross familiar streets
And meet again.

-
The broken record player that I am I will keep the haunting echoes at a minimal.

Thank you to those who have come and gone, those still here, and those yet to come.